Jun 22 2005

Something that deserves a post all by itself.

Our friends Naomi, John, Hannah and Jonah sent us a wonderful baby package that we got this past weekend. Although it didn’t contain much wanted pieces by renound artists Hannah (4) or Jonah (2) (Happy B-day Jonah!), it did have some of the most wonderful baby stuff I’ve seen. Of particular delight-inducing interest is a beautifully made kimono style shirt with little green piggies on a natural colored background. Precious!! Also, some great green and natural striped bottoms, a onesie that says “wiggle, giggle, coo” in front of a little dragonfly and a wonderfully soft, thick blankie. There were also two books by the Sears couple- “The Pregnancy Book’ and “The Birthing Book”. I’ve already read all the way through the birthing book! And for making me feel better- a MamaCare pack with belly salves and massage oils and bath stuff. They made the whole package smell good. (I feel like I’m forgetting something- likely, the way I’ve been going.) So a resounding THANK YOU to the lovely family. (By the way, I take out the little piggie shirt every day and smile at it! What a freak!!)

Jun 17 2005

Though I feel hideously guilty about it, sometimes I feel like I don’t really want to be a mother. Yeah, I know, I was trying to concieve and I had been talking about it forever before that, but now that I’m at that place where there’s no going back I’m a little scared. This is a change unlike any other in life. Not only have you made a decision for yourself, but also for another new person. What other choice is like that? So final and not only effecting you? Even death, though it matches in finality, doesn’t have a part similar to making the choice to bring a new life into the world. I will never not be a parent. My child is coming whether I like it or not and, even if I chose to put it up for adoption (something that will NEVER happen) that won’t change the fact that I gave birth to it. It’s somewhat panic inducing. I mean, can I change my order? I’d like a little monkey instead. That can’t cost as much as a baby, but I won’t ask for a refund or anything. Well?

But I love this boy. I love him already and I’ve only seen a few minutes of him wiggling around and looking very blue and alien. I don’t really want to go back, it’s just hard to not have the option. He will be with me all the time for the rest of my life, whether he is physically or not. How do parents cope with that?

It blows me away that so many people have children. They must just not think about it, but I don’t see how you couldn’t. I can’t stop. I appreciate my friends who have thought about it enough to realize that they don’t want children. I think we are the first in our close group to have a kid, which is surprising coming from our town. Most of the others I knew from high school had kids right away and probably have several by now. But this whole group has made it to ages 25-27 (approximately) with none. And they are wonderful people. They all just think a lot. The sad thing is, they are smart people who would, no doubt, have really cool kids.

John and I have decided on one, unless we strike it really rich! We ethically can’t see having more than one in a lot of ways. We each, at one point, thought about having none, but I think that (despite the anxiety) we are both very excited now that it’s happening. I don’t think I’ll ever need to do it again though.

At this point, I think I need to try to stop thinking about it. Is it really doing me any good? I’m just driving myself into a panic about something about which I can no longer do anything.

Deep breaths.

Jun 17 2005

Here’s what I got:

What Kind of Freaky Mother are you?

Jun 16 2005

Meet Cole Arthur Taylor

Yeah, no need to tell me. I know he’s pretty. (No, really, TELL me!!)

That last one- that’s his weinie. See the arrow? Now think:profile. That’s my boy!

Jun 16 2005

From Slack Bastard (sorry my dumbass MAC won’t let me link unless I go through the friggin code. He’s to the left.)

Smoked a cigarette? NO
Smoked a cigar? Yeuch, no.
Made out with a member of the same sex? No. Aren’t you all SO sad
Crashed a friend’s car? No
Stolen a car? No

Been in love? Yes. Since I started I haven’t stopped
Been dumped? Yes
Shoplifted? Yes, but it was an accident.
Been fired? Not officially, but yes
Been in a fist fight? Kind of

Snuck out of my parents house? No
Had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back? Not really
Been arrested? No
Made out with a stranger? Yes
Gone on a blind date? No

Lied to a friend? Yes
Had a crush on a teacher? No
Skipped school? Yes
Slept with a co-worker? No
Seen someone die? No (Dead? Yes)

Been to Canada? No
Been to Mexico? No
Been on a plane? Yes
Thrown up in a bar? No

Purposely set a part of myself on fire? Yes
Eaten sushi? Yes (Oh Yes Mmmmm)
Been snowboarding? No

Taken painkillers? Yes
Love someone or miss someone right now? Very much both
Laid on your back and watched the cloud shapes go by? Yes
Made a snow angel? Yes

Had a tea party? Hell Yeah
Flown a kite? Yes
Built a sand castle? Yes
Gone puddle jumping? Yes
Played dress up? All the time

Jumped into a pile of leaves? Yes
Gone sledding? Yes
Cheated while playing a game? Yes
Been lonely? Yes
Fallen asleep at work/school? Yes and recently

Used a fake ID? No
Watched the sun set? Yes
Felt an earthquake? Yes-woohoo!
Touched a snake? Yes

Been tickled? Yes
Been robbed? No
Robbed someone? No
Been misunderstood? I thought so
Pet a reindeer/goat? Yes/Yes

Won a contest? No
Run a red light? Yes, but I didn’t know I was- I didn’t even know there was a light.
Been suspended from school? No
Had a detention? No
Been in a car accident? Yes

Had braces? Yes
Felt like an outcast? I was in High School
Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night? Ben and Jerry used to be close friends of mine
Had deja-vu? Lots
Danced in the moonlight? Yes

Witnessed a crime? An awful one
Pole danced? No. Swung around one? Yes
Questioned your heart? Yes
Been obsessed with post-it notes? Ummm (yeah)

Squished barefoot through the mud? Yes
Been lost? Yes
Been to the opposite side of the country? Live there now
Swam in the ocean? Yes
Felt like dying? Close

Cried yourself to sleep? Yes
Played cops and robbers? Yes
Recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers? Yes
Sung karaoke? Yes
Paid for a meal with only coins? Yes

Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t? Yes
Made prank phone calls? Yes
Laughed till some kind of beverage came out of your nose? Yes. Soda. On all the Pizza. My Birthday
Caught a snowflake on your tongue? Yes
Kissed in the rain? Yes

Written a letter to Santa Claus? Yes
Been kissed under mistletoe? Yes
Watched the sunset with someone you care about? Yes
Blown bubbles? Yes
Made a bonfire on the beach? No, but I was there

Crashed a party and took their tap? No
Gone roller-skating? Yes
Had a wish come true? Yes.
Humped a monkey? WTF! How did you know?!!

Worn pearls? Yes
Jumped off a bridge? No
Screamed penis in class? Yes
Eaten dog/cat food? Yes
Told a complete stranger you loved/hated them? Yes.

Sang in the shower? Yes every day
Have a little black dress? Yes
Fucked in the park? What counts as a park?
Had a dream that you married someone? Yes
Glued your hand to something? Yes
Got your tongue stuck to a flag pole? No
Kissed a fish? No
Worn the opposite sexes clothes? All the time
Been a cheerleader? At home in my room by myself
Sat on a roof top? Yes

Had sex in church? In my head
Screamed at the top of your lungs? Yes
Done a one-handed cartwheel? No, dammit
Talked on the phone for more than 6 hours? Yes
Stayed up all night? Yes

Haven’t take a shower for a week? Yes, but only when I was MUCH younger
Pick and ate an apple right off the tree? Yes
Climbed a tree? Yes
Had a tree house? No, but my best friend did
Are scared to watch scary movies alone? Oh Yeah

Believe in ghosts? NO
Have more than 30 pairs of shoes? Ummm…In my closet or total?
Worn a really ugly outfit to school just to see what others say? Yes
Gone streaking? No
Played ding-dong-ditch? If I knew what it was…
Played monster in the bucket? Is that the one with the penis in the popcorn bucket with the hole cut in it? Then no.

Played chicken fight? Yes, but not with cars
Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? Yes
Been told you’re hot by a complete stranger? No, but two have asked me to marry them (I refused)
Broken a bone? No
Been easily amused? That’s how I get through each day

Caught a fish and ate it? Yes
Made porn? Do you REALLY want to know?
Caught a butterfly? Yes
Laughed so hard you cried? Yes
Cried so hard you laughed? Yes

Mooned/flashed someone? Does my husband count?
Had someone moon/flash you? Yes (shudder)
Cheated on a test? Yes
Forgotten someone’s name? Yes

Slept naked? Yes always
French braided someone’s hair? Yes
Gone skinny dipping in a pool? Yes but nobody else was there

Jun 15 2005

It’s official- we are going to have a son!

His scan looked great with everything looking beautiful and in the right places. The little stinker was more shy about showing his butt (for a complete look at his spine) than his boy-parts! Pictures will have to wait until this evening when we can get them scanned but, take my word for it, he is gorgeous. My important mommy-parts were deemed beautiful, as well.

Jun 15 2005

Well, obviously a long overdue site reconstruction occured last night. My lovely husband took the time to put up with my ridiculous requests and mind-changes and helped me update. It still needs some work, but that’ll have to wait for when I have some time to spend with photoshop. I am also going to add a link to some pictures, but we have to get them all web ready and stuff. So what do you think of the new heels? Any feedback?

Jun 13 2005

“Hey! Did you just grab my ass from across the room with your Force Grip?”

So, above is my Star Wars pick-up line. For those of you who know my history with my husband, you will find this as amusing as I do, I reckon. For those who don’t I give you the “short” version:

When I was in high school, I was a part of an acting group called (oh so cleverly) Teen Theatre. We wrote and acted in skits about teen “issues” like drugs, alcohol, suicide etc… really cheery stuff. The basic message was: don’t. Anyway, I was the VP of the club and so had to be present at all club meetings. One day, John decided to become a member of our techie crew (he says now that it was so he could meet chicks- I know for a fact that it was so he could hang around one particular chick, not me!). Even though we had gone to school together for all of high school (we were in the beginning of our senior year at this point) John and I had never met. Even though I was good friends with his sister.

Anyway, one evening we had a show that went spectacularly well and we were all really jazzed. We went to a local diner (the whole group) and sat at a huge table. I was at the head of the table and John was to my left with one person in between us. We started talking and, eventually, were talking only to each other and having a great time. I was sorry when it was time to leave. We all walked out to the parking lot and were having last chats when I got my brilliant idea.

Now, earlier in the week, I had found a huge list of really funny pick-up lines on the internet. I printed them out and we had great laughs about how ridiculous they were during our “rehearsals”. These were still pretty fresh in my mind on the evening in question.

So, back to my brilliant idea. I was wound up. That’s the only explanation I have for my bizarre behavior. I saw John across the parking lot talking to a couple of his guy friends. He had his back to me. I screwed up my courage to go say something to him before I left, but after I marched over the only thing I could think of was a pick up line. I grabbed his butt and said “Is this seat taken?” It didn’t make quite the impact that I had intended since he jumped about two feet into the air and yelped like I had bitten him. I didn’t quite know what to say after that and so I did the only thing I could think of: I ran. I jumped in my car with my sister and drove home as fast as I could.

A while after I got home, I got a call. John had gotten my number from a phone list he had from when he had tried to start up a debate club. My sister had wanted to join. He called to let me know that he thought it was funny that I had grabbed his butt and that it didn’t put him off at all. We talked for a couple hours that night and pretty much every night after.

We had our wedding ceremony four years later in 2001, finally signed marriage papers last year (three years later) and our first baby is due exactly on the 8th anniversary of that fateful night when I grabbed his ass.

John, I love you so much and I intend to keep grabbing your ass whenever I feel like it until the day we die.

Jun 10 2005

Last night John and I went to the Fabulous Pixies concert. Believe it or not, it was the very first real “rock” concert of my life. I truly didn’t know what to expect. We were a little silly and went early not knowing what to expect of the crowd. We ate a nice dinner and then walked over just after the gates were opened at 7. The crowd was really small, actually, which wasn’t a huge disappointment. Unfortunately, when the opening act finally started after 8 (and I was already hot and tired) they sucked butt. I think they were called the Dellarays, or something like that- anyway, really not good. The crowd sure didn’t respond to them. The only thing I can say for them is that I’ve never seen a hard rock band with a black, soul-singing, female lead before and the bass player was really amusing to watch. It was a new experience.

When the Pixies finally came on stage at about 9:30, they started out kinda rusty-sounding and slow. I was thinking “oh shit, I just paid WHAT to STAND here in the heat and humidity and listen to WHAT?!” But, they warmed up pretty fast and they sounded amazing after the first couple songs. I mean, REALLY good. THe crowd was not big, but obviously full of fairly devoted fans and, though they certainly showed their enthusiasm, weren’t overly crazy. It was way too loud, but I kept my little purse and my sweatshirt balled up in front of my belly and we moved farther back a couple of times. Nobody minds when you want to get FARTHER from the band! John quite gallantly moved me safely away from the only jackass in the crowd who was deciding to try to start a mosh pit in the back (retard). John put himself between me and the jackass and started muttering about thinly disguised homoeroticism and that obviously the jackass just wanted an excuse to touch his friend. I was laughing my ass off, but trying to not let it show so we wouldn’t get hassled.

The band all looked old. I know they’re not THAT old, but they really looked it. But they sounded the same, and that’s what counts! Have you ever seen the movie “The Name of the Rose” with Sean Connery and Christian Slater? Do you remember the very fat, very white, gay, bald priest who was into self-flagellation? That’s what Frank Black looks like now. I mentioned the STRIKING resemblance to John and he couldn’t get it out of his head all night. Too funny!!

We had a good time, but I honestly don’t see the appeal in going to concerts all the time. Too much noise, too much smoke, too many stupid people. Maybe it would be more fun with a group or maybe I’m just too old and pregnant. (Young Punks! Get off the grass!…whoa… hope I’m not at the cane-shaking level yet.) It’s just, $90 to be uncomfortable for 4 hours? Not really for me, I think. The music was really good, though. Mommy like, Daddy like and Piglet like. He was dancing with me the whole time! And John got to finally really feel him, he was kicking so hard. I choose to believe it was because he liked the music, not because he was in there screaming “Mom, you bitch, you’re hurting my ears with this stupid music! Get me the hell outta here!” No, my kid is cool. He liked it. I’m sure that he will be a one baby wave of mutilation and grow up to be, be a debaser (..debaser..). (Sorry, I just couldn’t help it.)

Surprisingly, I wasn’t the only obviously pregnant woman there. I thought I was going to be, but then a VERY pregnant woman came in leading her blind husband. What a pair! I hope they had fun- it looked like she could hardly walk!

Oh, one more note: Pregnant me+out past bedtime+coming from loud smoky concert=CAN”T DRIVE. We’ll leave it right there.

Jun 08 2005

I just realized that I completely forgot to post the menu for last weekend’s dinner party:

Aged Cheddar and Smoked Gouda with Crackers
Bagel Snacks with Cream Cheese, Smoked Pepper Salmon, Capers and Dill
Cherry Tomatoes
Crab Cakes with Lemon-Dill Sauce
Sweet Red Pepper Bisque
Tortellini Salad with Carrots, Red Bell Peppers and Scallions in a Fresh Tomato-Basil Dressing
Green Salad with Tomatoes and a Balsamic-Basil Vinaigrette
Strawberry-Rhubarb Pie and Vanilla Bean Ice Cream

Almost all home-made. Yum. The leftovers are good, too.