Jun 24 2005

Big belly happenins last night! I’m so excited. I was lying on the futon waiting for John to be finished with the computer (so I could talk to him, not use it myself) when I realized that my belly was wiggling. I propped myself up and looked closer and was finally able to see Cole’s kicks! He was really active and I told John to come over quick to see. He was distracted by the fucking computer (like ALWAYS) and wouldn’t come over for a few minutes. Of course, by then Cole decided to take a break. I was pissed that whatever was on the computer was more important (even though it wasn’t likely to GO AWAY or anything) than seeing his son move. This is not a new issue with us. He waited for a little while watching my belly but it didn’t really happen again as strongly. He missed out and it really sucked. Later that night while we were reading in bed Cole started jumping around again. I pulled the covers off and yelled at John to look. Cole cooperated by continuing to give my insides a pummeling so his daddy could see him- and see him well! John got really excited too and couldn’t help putting a hand on my belly to feel the enormous jumps. It was amazing. Cole made it hard to fall asleep with all the dancing he was doing in there. I woke up at about 4:30 to find him balled up in the top right section of my uterus. Before this morning, he had been a lot more spread out, or at least I couldn’t feel him in any distinct spot like that. It was really neat to be able to put my hand on his little body and feel like I was cupping his tiny bum in my palm. Maybe I wasn’t, but that’s what it felt like. It was very sweet. I feel like he’s leaping over all sorts of developmental hurdles all of a sudden. My baby is growing up so fast already!

We have a midwife appointment next tuesday. I really enjoy going to my appointments. Being in the midwife center and around the midwives makes me feel really calm and comfortable- which is good since that’s where I plan to give birth! They are really amazing women and, though I don’t get to choose which of the five will actually attend the birth, I have no worries that they will take really good care of us.

I am having a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that I am in my sixth month of pregnancy. For some reason, I kept thinking that I was still only in my fifth month. This weekend I will be at 23 weeks. Only a week more and I will be a full six months pregnant and off into my seventh month. SEVEN! I felt like it would NEVER get here! Next week I will have only 17 weeks left… crazy. It seems like only yesterday that I was walking around with my tummy pooched out so that EVERYBODY would know I was pregnant. No need anymore! Those 17 weeks are going to go fast too, what with my mom coming and our vacation in august. That’s alright. We don’t really have much to get ready. We aren’t doing a baby’s room since he will be sleeping in ours; we have a few more things to buy- like a crib and diapers- but there’s no rush, we know where to get both quickly; we’ve got the childbirth classes lined up for July- one per week for the whole month, no biggie; if he didn’t get any more clothes between now and birth he would still be a well dressed young man (I’d just have a lot of laundry to do!). Yeah, there’s stuff I’d like to take care of but if most of it doesn’t get done it won’t be the end of the world. I’m trying my best to just be realxed about all this, since I have a history of psyching myself out. So far I’m doing pretty well. There have been no hysterical hypochondriac calls to the midwife (actually, no calls at all!) and by that I am amazed!