Beth, over at her “pro” blog, wrote a post about how, as moms, we let things go that we never thought we could. I think it’s a very interesting thing to consider, the way our priorities shift so dramatically. Before I had a baby, I thought that having kids would be like ME with a baby. Now it’s more like NEW me with a BABY (note the significance of the caps). It’s not the same me that was before I went into labor and it’s CERTAINLY not the same baby experience I expected (in fact, I’m not sure what I expected now that I think about it…).
I had all of these grand plans to read to Cole every night, breastfeed until…whenever, never let him sleep on his tummy, wait for solid food until at least 6 months, give him plenty of tummy time during the day, and sing, sing, sing my heart out to him whenever we were together. And daycare- NEVER daycare!
Reality: most nights (until very recently) we fall asleep before we get a chance to read (and let’s not even discuss what that means for bath time). We all know that breastfeeding went out the door at about 6 weeks (and still- waaahhhh!). He sleeps on his tummy sometimes; no biggie. But tummy time? Yeah, right. Not only does he hate being on his tummy when he’s awake, but, because we live with his grandparents, the kid is NEVER put down. He is never going to crawl. We started limited solid foods at about 3 months because he just seemed so ready. And singing? Whenever I think about doing it I can never remember any songs (except, absurdly, “You Give Love a Bad Name” by Bon Jovi last night. WTF?!). Oh yeah, daycare? Yup- daycare.
And it’s okay. Cole and I love each other so much. I know it when I’m greeted by a flapping, screeching, grinning, wriggling creature every afternoon at daycare. I know when he snuggles up to me, just to know I’m there, at night. I know when he strokes my hand or face or back when he’s nursing. I know when he laughs the hardest when I tickle him.
Every kid is different, every mommy is different, every style is different. Cole and I are pretty laid back about it all. Schedule? What schedule? We’ll get there eventually.
And I like it that way.
It helps that he’s really friggin cute.