Jun 20 2006

Our Weekend

Cole in his frog floaty.
Cole and the Monster of the Deep Me
Baby’s First Rib Bone
With Daddy on Daddy’s Day
After shower nakie-time.

I Love my family.
Jun 19 2006

Big Daddy Pants Day

We had a lovely father’s day. John got to have everything his way for a day (except that he had to mow my parent’s lawn)! I made crepes for breakfast, we had smoothies for lunch (it was SO hot) and we had his family over for pizza and swimming.

I do have pictures, I just don’t have my camera with me today. You’ll just have to hang on. I know you can do it.

Jun 16 2006

Will the weekend erase these problems? No, but the time off and a big bottle of Tequila will sure make it feel a lot better!

The past three days now I have been called in to see the head of HR. Not because I’m doing something wrong, but because I have reported on the unacceptable behavior of others in my office.

What do I mean by unacceptable behavior? Well, one guy was just milimeters away from seriously sexually harrassing me (and I’m pretty fuckin’ easy going) and another has been berating people behind their backs but in front of me. I’ve had enough. I don’t want to hear this crap anymore, so I told my supervisor who told HR.

A part of me feels like a tattle-tale, like I should be able to just buck up and forget about it. The thing is, I know that too many of the major problems in this office spring from the horrible attitude of, particularly, these two guys. Only, they are “so valuable” that they get away with it and have for years.

But enough is enough. I’m tired of the harrassment and disrespect. They treat me like a tool who is just here for their use and not worth their notice otherwise. I don’t deserve it.

You be nice to my momma.

Or I’ll huck a loogie on your forehead.
Jun 15 2006

New photos, but to make it more interesting…

I am so sexeeee! Look at my hat and my truck. Don’t you want me?

Gimme a kiss.

Oh No! I am hideous!

No! No more pictures!

I disgust myself so much that I just threw up on my own leg.

Now, where is that mommy-thing to clean this all up?

Do I hear daddy footsteps?

I guess I’ll clean it up myself because mommy-thing sure isn’t helping.

So much better. Now, gimme a kiss.

Jun 14 2006

My Baby Einstein

I have started using baby sign language with Cole in the hope that he will be better able to communicate and to avoid potential frustrations (at least a couple) along the way.

And oh my goodness- is he brilliant. I have only been using the sign for milk for a short time now, but he already responds to it. When I sign it, he flaps his arms, kicks his legs, makes little noises, and leans forward with his mouth open as if my hand was his bottle.

I have also started using food/eat, good, and more. Tonight I will start sleep/tired.

He doesn’t use the signs himself yet (he doesn’t even quite have the coordination to leave a cheerio in his mouth- he just sucks on his fist with the cheerio safely trapped inside), but I can see the interest. He stares intently at my hands when I sign.

It’s so exciting to see him growing and learning. This is the most wonderful part of being a parent for me. The hugs and kisses are fantastic, and I would never want to do without them. But the chance to see a human develop from birth- it’s priceless. It’s unmatched. And it’s amazing to think about how we all develop so differently, even though the steps we all have to take are fundamentally the same. What incredible creatures we all are.

Jun 14 2006

I think I’m alone on this one…

I just ran an errand for work. I was driving through town and went to pull into a left turn lane. As is my habit (from bus driving days), I checked over my left shoulder to see that no one had pulled in there before me, only to freak out when I saw a car directly beside me! We were going to crash!!

Only, upon double checking, not a car, after all. Just the edge of my own sunglasses. Am insufferable bonehead.

Jun 13 2006

Oh, yum.

I just saw a lunch that made me want to steal it. I’ve never done anything like that, and I’m not likely to start now, but oh! Did it look yummy! A warm, homemade calzone with marinara heaped on top and a crunchy, cool green salad on the side. Mmmmmm…..

Oh, sorry about that. The drool- I just can’t stop it. It’s hereditary.

(Does anybody ACTUALLY do that? Lunch stealing, I mean. Has that happened to anyone in real life? And by real life I do not mean when you saw the sandwich episode of Friends.)

Jun 12 2006

So this is how it happens…

The one friend I made in Pittsburgh who I still keep in touch with just told me (and I was the FIRST to be told!) that she and her husband are pregnant. They have been trying for about 7 months, but she has some ovary “issues” and it just wasn’t happening. Now they are about 6 weeks along and have already had two ultrasounds to confirm. It’s happening.

I’m so excited for her (even though I don’t really like how she and her husband interact with each other and I have serious doubts about him as a father- but that’s another story). I keep reflecting on how things were for me at each stage and emailing back and forth with her. It’s been a wonderful way to relive my pregnancy without actually having to be pregnant.

Except that I’ve realized that, OMFG, I’m the new (*gulp*) ASS-VICE giver! Fuck, bugger, shit-bricks.

I SWORE that I wouldn’t do that! Up and down and sideways- I was NOT going to be that person. But now I am! What happened to me?

Childbirth. That’s what fucking happened. Childbirth turned this person who could previously keep her opinions to herself when not asked (most of the time) into one of those damn biddies who stops you in the grocery store and tells you that you need to feed your baby more milk and sausage because that’s what she did and now her kids are grown up and each a good, healthy 500 pounds! And Oh! Let me stick my old biddy fingers in your baby’s mouth and give him whatever cold I’ve picked up from the old folks home! Aaakk!

Yes, childbirth has turned me into an “expert” on all things baby related. Doctor? Pssht. Who needs a doctor? Forget them- just ask me!

Anyway… I have to really work on keeping my advice to myself unless she asks (but then, even if she does ask, how do I know she really wants advice and isn’t just humoring me or something? Oh god- this is too complicated! Do I have to sever ties with her completely in order to avoid offending her with my advice? Would not talking to her be more or less offensive?). So far, I’ve tried to limit myself to just telling her about what books I liked and which I hated. Is that too bad?

To those of you who don’t yet have children, this may seem a bit strange. But heed my warning- when you do become pregnant? The ass-vice-ers will come for you, too. And I might be one of them…

Jun 09 2006

Le PINCE, Monsieur Bretodeau!

(I’ve probably butchered the spelling. Sorry, Naomi. Please don’t be TOO disappointed in me!)

Cole is in a pinching stage right now. He doesn’t pinch to be mean and it’s really more like he grabs with the tips of his fingers than pinches like an older kid would. But it still hurts. He likes to squeeze the fat on the back of my arm and on my side. He also grabs the tendons in my neck. And, recently, he has been grabbing my waddle.

You know the waddle- the skin along the front of your neck that’s just a bit looser to allow you to put your head back. The first time I heard that name for it was on Ally McBeal. I didn’t watch that show for long- I got into it late and got out when it turned unabashedly weird with all the forced strange character traits, weirdly unfeminist and sexist character development, and absolutely plodding plot. But anyway- the waddle.

I don’t have much of a waddle- I don’t look like a turkey or anything, but there’s just enough skin there for Cole to grab and pinch. And he doesn’t just do it once. Instead, he squeezes repeatedly, as if he were trying to milk a cow.

I know he doesn’t realize what he’s doing, but every time he squeezes my fat I feel like everyone is noticing all of the extra I have and I get really embarrassed (Does it make me stop stuffing doritos in my face? No. But it’s still embarrassing)(By the way- Doritos and wine, as suggested by Beth= really good idea).

I guess I’m not asking for advice or anything. I’m just thinking out loud.

(I mean, you guys do realize that this blog is 100% stream of thought and that I don’t edit posts AT ALL. Each one takes no more than about 15 minutes.)

(Now you’re all thinking “Oh! That explains a LOT! Except, Oh. Oh my. Much freakier than we even realized. Gosh. I think I’ll stop reading now.”)

Jun 09 2006

Project: Cole Update

Oh, a blossoming nerdling. How sweet…


The nerd baby will slay you with his light saber and then eat 10 frozen burritos.

Cole has now decided that this is the appropriate face to make EVERY time I try to take a picture of him. It would be hilarious if it didn’t mean that I can never show you haw cute he truly is:


Seriously- he made this face EVERY TIME! I am NOT joking!!! It was maddeningly frustrating! But also hilarious.

It was an unintentional hiatus I took from blogging the last few days. Wednesday Blogger was being a bitch (like, what else is new?) and I had a CRAZY day at work. Thursday I took the day off because Cole had his well baby checkup. With shots.

Ouch, ouch and……………………ouch!

But he was so brave and strong. He cried for a second until I picked him up and gave him kisses. I love having the power to make it all better. It helped that the nurse was the quickest draw I’ve EVER seen. She was slapping those bandaids on faster than I could say Mercury poisoning.

He checked out just fine. He’s now 19lbs, 8 oz. and 28 1/2 inches tall- long and THIN for his age! Can you believe it? Those cheeks and he’s still considered thin…

Random beautiful baby parts:


He’s mine and still I say “squee, Squee, SQUEE!”

And guess who finally found the black and white setting on her camera? Shut up. I don’t have a manual- I FOUND my camera, remember? I have to figure it all out by myself. What? There are websites about that?

Shut up.