Aug 10 2006

A small slice of neurosis.

So I got this gorgeous new camera, right, because my old camera bit it. I bought a case for it and everything, that’s how much in love with it I am. I never had a case for the old one in all the three years I had it (and I wonder why it broke!). This camera is delicious and sparkly and whiz-bangy and good.

And I’ve taken exactly 7 pictures with it in the two weeks I’ve owned it.

What the hell is my problem?

Is this going to be like the sticker thing? When I was growing up I had a fascination with stickers. Any stickers. Even the ones off of fruit. But I loved them so much that I couldn’t EVER use them.

Instead, they stayed in a paper bag in my desk drawer. I would take them out and categorize them on my bed, occasionally thinking “I could use this one on Grammy’s birthday card” or some such thing. But I never did.

When we moved from Pittsburgh back to California, we threw away/gave away/donated/sold almost everything that we felt wasn’t entirely necessary so that we’d be able to get everything into one moving truck. I still have those stickers. None have ever been used. Some are the ugliest things you’ve ever seen. They are all stickers only a little kid would like. I don’t take them out any more even. I have no idea why I still keep them.

Anyway, I just don’t want the camera to be like the stickers. In my head it’s as if I could use it up or something. It’s like I can only use it if I have the EXACT PERFECT picture I want.

What a dumbass.

(And don’t even get me started about using candles.)

Aug 10 2006


That’s IT?! I invite you all into my home to celebrate the 27th anniversary of my birth and I get TWO responses?!


You guys don’t love me at all, do you?

You’d better all have really good excuses for not showing up. Living in another state is not good enough!!T