Jan 04 2007

Offer. Offffferrrrrrr.

Okay- yes. We put in the freaking offer today. I’m just avoiding talking or even thinking about it because I’m scared shitless that they will turn around and say “HA! What are you smoking? Not only will we not sell you the house for that much, but we also are raising our asking price. And we’re thinking about suing you for millions.”

Alright, alright- I know they can’t sue us.

I just felt really stupid and poor when our Realtor looked at us with his mouth agape and said “That number you just gave me? That number that represents nearly all of your money in the entire world? That goes into F***-you territory. You need to go higher.”


(Barfing into my handbag. Wait- I don’t carry a handbag. What did I just barf into?)

They have three days to get back to us. Three looooooooong days which with to craft their painful response. I’m hoping they don’t use too many curse words.

Can you swear in a counter offer? Here’s what I expect:

Dear Cheap-Ass, Poor, Insulting, Mother-Fucking Buyers (John and Danielle),

Fuck you. We spit on your offer. Take your offer and shove it up your bums. Then shove it up your Realtor’s bum for making it seem like you could ever get this house.

Meanie-Head Sellers

Am I blowing this out of proportion?

Jan 04 2007

The Great Nudie-Patootie!

Soundtrack provided by the tub water.

Nak1e C01e on Vimeo