Aug 25 2008

And So

And so I cleaned. It happens occasionally.

The stress builds up and I start to lose it over all of the things I can’t control, and so I take back control over those things I can.

The chaos had gotten to be too much. I could overlook it when I was feeling okay, but when everything else went crazy, my ocd took over.

So yesterday I cleaned. I organized Cole’s room, I scrubbed all of the baseboards in the house, I de-nastified the shower, I washed all of the bathroom rugs, I did several other loads of laundry, including the towels that had been sitting there forever, I picked everything off of our bedroom floor and vacuumed the crap out of it. When the vacuum started to smell funny, I even turned it off and pulled out every piece of hair/string/floss that had been wrapped around the beater bar. I scrubbed the toilets- even the backsides.

And last night, for just a little while, I sat in my newly very clean room and played my guitar, exploring bits of the “Guitar for Dummies” book I got for a dollar from the library on Saturday. And I felt really good. No headache- the only pain was from my fingertips re-callousing and the bruise on my ankle that I got from smacking into the rocking chair. No guilt- I worked so hard that I was more than deserving of a break. No sadness- my house was clean, my family was healthy and happy. Just me, my guitar, and the tablature for Neko Case.

And it was good.

This is a short week for me. I’ll be trying to leave with Cole Thursday morning for a 4-day music festival in the mountains. I’m taking my guitar.


  • By HeatherPride, August 25, 2008 @ 12:31 pm

    Have an awesome time at your music festival! Hey, I haven’t broken out my guitar since I was pregnant with my first baby and my stomach got too big to play it! How is Guitar for Dummies, are you learning anything?

  • By NGS, August 25, 2008 @ 2:02 pm

    Awesome. A short week will go by fast!!

  • By ticknart, August 26, 2008 @ 10:24 am

    Just looked to see who’ll be playing and I have one thing to say:

    Enjoy the shows!

  • By Jami, August 26, 2008 @ 11:39 am

    You and Cole (and everybody else) have a gorgeously magnificent time in the mountains!! You deserve it!

  • By Yoli, August 27, 2008 @ 3:25 pm

    I wanted to go so bad, but we had other plans made. I’d rather be up there though… Have a great time!!!

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