Jun 21 2006

What Did I Get Myself Into?

This Saturday we are hosting a birthday party for my niece (who turned 6 on the 7th of this month, but her parents decided to wait until the 24th for her party). Seriously, have I been smoking crack? Have you been seeing me down in front of the bars at night begging for a fix and you just didn’t tell me about it? Because that’s the only explanation I can think of.

I don’t even know what I’m in for. I haven’t been to a birthday for a six year old girl since mine in 1985. I don’t think I had much fun then, either. I was an overly serious girl.

So… Questions:

What does one even do for a six year old girl? Are pinatas, like, totally last decade? What about a rousing game of “Pick up the dog poo from the back yard?” I’ll hand out plastic bags and whoever cleans it up the fastest can go home with it all.

I already got her some presents. I got girly, pink and purple clothes, a Cinderella purse, sparkly lip gunk, sunglasses, and obnoxious gum (2 packs!)(What- it’s not like she’s my daughter. I don’ t have to deal with her identification with unrealistic role models and traditional roles for women. That’s for her parents to fuck up!). Now I have to take my nephew out to go present shopping for her and I’m tapped for ideas. Any suggestions? I think my nephew will probably pick something having to do with motorcycles, and I’m not sure she’d be too into that.

And what about rules for the party? Can I isolate all the kids in the room with the floor that’s easiest to clean? Or outside? In the 100 degree heat (There’s a hose)? What about putting up a baby gate across the entrance to my living room (with off-white carpet, no less) and a sign that says “Adult Lounge- Must be 18 years or older to enter”?

Finally, can I serve pink, frothy, irresistable-to-children drinks loaded with alcohol, or do you think that could turn ugly?

Any suggestions would be helpful as I am totally and completely fucking lost.

(I also think it’s a really good thing that I am the mother to a boy.)

1 Comment

  • By Rude Cactus, June 23, 2006 @ 6:20 am

    Good luck. I wish you good luck and plenty of extra sanity!

Other Links to this Post

RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI

Leave a comment